Make Time for Deliberate Fun

What do you like to do for fun?

Can you answer that question? I couldn’t. When my wellness coach asked me that question I could not think of an answer. Blank…nada…nothing…

How could that be? I like to have fun! There are things I like to do aren’t there?

The truth is I was not setting aside time for deliberate FUN in my life.

You see, my life has changed drastically in the last 10-15 years. I went from a carefree fun-loving twenty-something woman to a Wife, Mom and busy business owner.

While being a Mom of 3 busy boys, I found myself doing everything for them. And lets face it…when they are young, they need us minute by minute. That changes…soon its hour by hour then several times a day to “Hey…are they even home?”

Feeling like they are not around might mean they are in some room zoned out on electronics playing Minecraft or building their NHL team as a General Manager. Perfect for a kid that dreams of being a GM of an NHL team one day.  You can do anything you set your mind to, my boy!

Now while there are some people reading this that are saying “wow…she lets her kids zone out on electronics? What an awful Mom!” Listen…I am not a bad Mom.  I pick and choose my battles. I limit use as much as I can but seriously…it’s summer and my hubby and I both work from home. We need them to be occupied doing something else for a while so we can get work done. Otherwise they’re asking for a snack every 5 minutes or are fighting over Lego pieces. World War III might break out! None of us want that!

Ok…back to it. My priorities have changed over the years. So here is the thing…it’s ok that your priorities change. As our seasons of life change, so do our priorities. As my kids get older, I am finding more time that I can carve out for myself and for fun. Deliberate FUN!

When my coach asked me what I liked to do for fun and I couldn’t answer, I spent the next few days obsession about it…there must be something. 3 days later it came to me…GOLF! My hubby and I used to life to GOLF! We haven’t gone in years but it is still something I enjoyed. I quickly messaged my coach and told her. I felt a bit of relief…not having an answer to that question had made me feel I had failed myself in some way.

But the truth is, while I didn’t do anything deliberately for fun, we still had a lot of fun as a family. Lots of spur-of-the-moment style fun. Lots of laughs…I mean come on…say the word “fart” in front of young boys and endless giggles ensue! I decided I was not going to beat myself up over it but instead be thankful that I had a new awareness that deliberate fun was missing in my life. I began mission to change that.

I started saying YES to things. YES to social gatherings. YES to my kids when they ask to pay a board game. YES to vacation time.  YES to building Lego.

And you know what? Saying YES has made me happier. I have made connections on levels I never would of if I had said NO. I have caught up with old friends, make new friends and ultimately live a happier life.

Honestly, I am still searching for the “THING” I love to do for just me. But for right now, I am making space and time to say YES to things that will bring me closer to finding it.

I challenge everyone to make space for deliberate FUN! Schedule it just like you would a business meeting or children’s extra curricular activity in your calendar. Test things out.

  • Always wanted to paint?  Find a paint class.
  • Thought about learning to play guitar? Find a music teacher.
  • Miss the sport you played as a kid?  Find a pick-up hockey league and lace up your skates!

Go out and have DELIBERATE FUN, making space for more joy and contentment in your life!